Fun and Games

"What was that?" I called out to Andy who was off to the side of the dirt road.

"Oh great," he said, thoroughly disgusted and shaking his head.

Together, we took off after the dark shadow that was trying to elude the two men on horseback.


When Andy asked for help moving cattle, it was an easy answer.  He never turned me away when a favor was asked and I would never say no to him.  The herd had already been trucked to the summer pasture, so we just needed to haul our horses up in a trailer and move them to the proper allotment.

While in the pickup truck, Andy explained how the herd needed pushed up a hill and through a gate, making it sound like a relatively short and easy task.  As he turned and dropped off the road, I noticed the group of cattle scattered throughout the sagebrush flat and Andy pointed to a mountain and replied, "That's where we have to take them."

I looked through the bug splattered windshield and initially thought he was joking.  "Ya, right...sure that's were they need to go," I responded while scanning the steep incline and scoffing how far it was up to the top.

"I'm serious," he said while turning his head and giving me a sly grin.

After bantering back and forth, I learned he was telling the truth and many of us later spread out on horseback and began to gather the group of cattle.  As they merged into a single mass, they were directed towards the steep slope where even the cows thought we were joking as they fanned out along the base, refusing to step one hoof up on the incline.

Through a lot of cussing and perseverance, lead cows finally began the first steps of a very long climb.  Initially, they zigged and zagged and tried to get back past us, but soon everyone fell into little, single-file groups that found angled wild game trails to follow up the slope.

Horses blew hard during the ascent and quickly lathered up the frothy salt mixture of sweat beneath their saddle blankets and breast collars.  Breaks were frequent and the resistance from cattle ambling downhill ebbed the higher we climbed. 

As we crested the top, the cattle picked up the pace and were driven through the open gate.  After the last ones passed, the gate was closed with the mission acomplished.  We all congratulated one another on doing something that I honestly doubted was possible.

We headed back downhill, feet hard in the stirrups while leaning back to offset gravity.  I was on Ted, a goofy bay colored horse that I rarely rode.  He was alright, but was easily distracted; kind of like the ADD kid that shifts full attention from one shiny object to another.  Ted's head willy-nilly bounced around and I was glad when we hit level ground.  But, I caught a glimpse of the tail end of a bull kicking up dust trying to get away from us.

Andy and I pursued the renegade at breakneck speed who was eluding capture by running through a stand of aspens.  I gave Ted his head to allow him to pick his way through the trees because at our speed, too much real estate was covered for him to react to my reining.  Ted ran hard and was doing a smooth slalom course through the trees until...

WHAM! 

I got blown out of the saddle as he rubbed alongside a tree which caught me above my knee with the impact blasting me up and out of the seat.  I landed with a thud and through star-speckled vision, I noticed Ted had stopped and, nonchalantly with his head down, he was grazing.  Thanks, asshole.

My rope that had been in my right hand was dangling from a high branch like a skinny tree snake.  I struggled to stand.  My pelvis felt like it had split in two as I hobbled towards Ted. I hurt too bad to even attempt to get back up on the horse and hurt too much to even wish bad things on him for his clever little trick. 

Andy and other riders managed to get the bull turned up the hill as I slowly shuffled along like a geriatric 97 year old with killer bunions.  Despite the truck being within view, it took a massive effort of tiny steps and many breaks to finally swing the trailer gate open.  I loaded Ted and stretched out on the truck's bench seat to use as my gurney while they fought the bull up the hill to join the others.

Like many things in life, it's all fun and games until somebody gets hurt.