Diary of a Wimpy Leg

Dear Dairy,

I wish I had more nerdy computer skills, because I know the mobile format to read the following will make a mess of things.  Oh well.....

Who would have thought I would ever make an entry in a diary such as this,

But after my Achilles tendon got chopped on, my life is not so bliss.

I've become a burden to my other leg and a long list of names,

But I really celebrated when Mr. Plaster Cast went up in glorious flames.

An incision at the back of my heel is far from looking very pretty,

But a huge cotton sock now surrounds me and is as soft as a Persian kitty.

Then a removeable boot is velcroed together making enough noise to wake the dead,

And I'm still required to hobble around on crutches and waste the day away in bed.

My left side has become the great compensator for my lack of any participation,

So the left calf and thigh are lopsidedly huge due to powering all locomotion.

The right lower leg looks awkward with the foot attached to the knee by merely a thin shinbone,

The calf muscle shrunk and can't be found, so I reported it missing to police over the telephone.

At least now my toes are not all squished together in that ugly-ass cast,

And, when the boot is off,  previously unreachable itches can now be scratched really fast.

I can feel the 2 anchor points spiking the tendon back onto the newly sculpted heel,

I wish Gorilla glue or another super adhesive had been used in that part of the surgery deal.

Pain pills are thankfully over, but the day after surgery I hurt so bad I really needed mercy,

So I begged and pleaded for morphine or a spinal block at the local hospital's emergency.

Bigger and better pain killers showed up and were ate like candy from a neverending dish,

But the side effects caused much consternation and dreaming for a simple bathroom wish.

With the boot off, I am extremely gentle with physical therapy on my tender body part,
Range of motion is minimal with going through the alphabet being the place to start.
With my big toe I trace print letters, both in small case and capitalized,
But flowing cursive, big and small, is far more friendly I quickly realized.

The rest of the body is eager to get out and get everything back in motion,

But, for now, movement is restricted to looking for dry skin and applying scent-free lotion.

Doc says full recovery ranges from a quick 6 months and maybe up to a year,

My goal is secretly 5 months, and, if so, I'll celebrate with lots and lots of beer.

Adios for now, I seriously doubt I'll make another entry,

But, who knows, I never in my wildest dreams thought I would ever have a diary.

And even funnier yet is that I created this whole silly blog,

I'm committed to keeping it running awhile since its inception during my pain killer fog.