Sunday, April 6, 2014

Moustache Unplugged #9

Hehehe...undetected, I take the opportunity to write a letter...


Dear Warrior Dash,

In following the advice of many literary coaches to keep prose succint, YOU SUCK!


You boast being the world's largest obstacle race series so I expected better from you, but I must outright acknowledge the best thing you provide is support for St. Jude Children's Research Hospital--soon you will have raised 9 million dollars and I say thank you.

However, attention to details is vital for people returning to your race. I will not fault the race itself, I knew it was a 5k "mud" race with only 12 obstacles at the base of Copper Mountain Ski resort.  But, it was post-race where you significantly blundered.

On my second year returning to your race, a 16 year old in my wave of runners ran me into the ground. At the finish line, young Cade was delightfully humble and extremely respectful as he explained convincing his parents to take a summer trip to Colorado from Texas where he could also run in the race. His performance kept him not only #1 in his age group, but also #1 overall for most of the day. But, a late wave sparked an elite runner who bumped Cade to #2 overall--still quite the feat considering thousands participated.

During your awards ceremony at the end of the day, cheesy plastic beer mugs were handed out.  Apparently, the metal gladiator helmet trophies were left behind so award winners were told to write their names and addresses on a tattered, scrap piece of paper so the trophies could be mailed.

REALLY?

Well, to add insult to injury, your promise was also broken!

How do I know? Because I was fortunate enough to be on the podium for my age group and never received the trophy. I run for mental health and enjoy the physical health as a side benefit. I never, ever thought I'd win any kind of running award since its always been me versus myself and I have never considered myself any kind of gifted runner. So, when you promised a trophy, I expected it. After several months, it never materialized, so I sent an email. I was tossed an excuse that they would be mailed just as soon as the manufacturer finished making them.  Alright, but after a few more months, I sent a blistering email and received a response gushing with a bunch of blah, blah, blah.

I can be somewhat persistent with tunnel-vision, especially when wronged, so I kept after your ass.  The trophy eventually arrived and I naturally assumed all other winners received their hard earned awards, especially young Cade. But, guess what I learned?

A friend who finished in the women's overall never got her trophy...and never heard from you! Shame, shame.

I've not returned to your race and have no desire. Even dangling the carrot of trying to qualify for the newly created World Championships in California will not stir me to enter your race.

I hope you make things right with past winners...especially young Cade who I have watched and have noticed he has also not returned to your race.

Make good on your promises!

Do Better,
The Moustache

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